Listen, Learn, and Love - 3 Keys to Harmony

Dr. Joan's Advice

Date: 04/21/2014

By: Dr. Joan

Subject: Name-Calling is a Form of Abuse

Dear D-A:

Why are you calling yourself a D-A? Ok, I get the picture: You’ve adopted the name for yourself because your neighbor, in a fit of anger, called you a Dumb-A. As a retort, you hurled a label back at him by yelling “heel” when he turned on his heel and hurried into his house to get away from you.

Both of you need to cut the name-calling, right now. You are engaging in a form of passive abuse, but nevertheless, it is a digging way of hurting each other and one that sticks in the memory for a long time.

What is behind the name-calling between you? If it is the simple fact you need to leash your dog, then for goodness sake, leash the animal. Most municipalities have a leash law. Is yours one of them? I’ll bet it is and that’s why your neighbor is riled when he finds your roaming pet in his yard, digging up his flower bed.

Here are my suggestions to calm the waters of your neighborly relationship:

(1) Apologize about your laxity in leashing your animal and declare your good intentions to keep your dog on leash.

(2) Offer your hand and apologize for calling him a “heel.” My guess is he will apologize for calling you a Dumb-A. Then you can drop the D-A moniker and get back to whatever your real names are, like Sam and Jim.

Dr. Joan’s Harmony Key: Leash the tongue, as well as the dog.

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