Right off the bat, stop calling yourself names. If you call yourself “Moody Man” you are reinforcing negative feelings and perhaps making yourself more sad, more mad, more distant from your family. What we tell ourselves resounds throughout our minds and bodies. So, here are four simple ideas to say to yourself which may lift your spirits and help improve the harmonious atmosphere within your family unit:
Idea 1: I PROVIDE for my family’s physical needs, to the best of my ability, with shelter, food, education, and protection. These are specific ways I provide:
Idea 2: I am a NURTURING husband and father. I nurture family members in demonstrable ways by spending time together, by talking about events, plans, and dreams, by solving problems together, by having fun together, etc. These are the specific ways I nurture:
Idea 3: I LISTEN TO and LEARN MORE about each member of my family in specific, notable ways. These are the ways I listen and learn:
Idea 4: I LOVE my family and my family loves me. I SPEAK OF MY LOVE in some way each day, at least to some of my family members, if not all of them. These are the things I say about my love:
Memorize these ideas. Say them on your way to work. Say them each night as you go to sleep. In your journal, dedicate a section for each idea and make daily notes about how you put each idea to work for you and your family.
You can expect that as you learn and practice these behaviors, they will become habitual. You, in turn, may notice a difference in how you feel about yourself and how you react to members of your family. You may hear a new harmony in your family which will be music to your ears.
Dr. Joan’s Harmony Key: If your moods are rocking the boat, change your sail.