Listen, Learn, and Love - 3 Keys to Harmony

Dr. Joan's Advice

Date: 05/14/2013

By: Dr. Joan

Subject: When You Feel Trapped

Dear Trapped in a Corner:

I rush to reassure you. There is HOPE. You don’t say why you feel trapped and it does not matter. What I am going to advise that you do, applies to any situation. When we feel like we’re stuck and there is no path out of the corner, we must take action.

Here’s what I suggest you do:

1. Quickly RE-THINK what happened. For example, let’s say your boss blamed you for loss of a client. He accused you of “mouthing off” during a meeting and said the client withdrew his account, giving no explanation. But the boss claimed the loss of business was due to your comments to the client, when, in fact, the only thing you did was offer an alternative idea to a problem. That is not "mouthing off.” You know, in your heart, you did nothing wrong. Your conscience is clear. This RE-THINK step requires very little time. Move to the next step with alacrity.

2. SURVEY your environment. By that I mean, look around and see WHAT and/or WHO is nearby. Believe it or not, there is always a window of opportunity. Your job is to notice the window, open it, and crawl through. Or there may be a person ready to help, someone you least expect. For example, in our illustration, perhaps you can reach over to your desk, pick up the phone, and call the disappearing client. Find out for yourself if he left because you offended him, or if there was another reason that he would care to discuss. If he was offended, this is your chance to apologize. Often, we find that there are myriad reasons a client leaves. It just may be that the former client may have an offer in his pocket for you!

My friend, you will find a way out of the corner where you feel trapped. The critical point is, don’t just stand in the corner. Look for opportunities and take positive action. Remember Little Jack Horner? He sat in the corner, eating his pie (or some such goodie.) He stuck in his thumb, pulled out a plumb, and said, “What a good boy am I.” If you feel like you have been cornered, pull out a plumb.

Dr. Joan’s Harmony Key: Your happiness is in your own hands.

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